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Dark Heresy Blunder 001 by TheCommissarFangirl Dark Heresy Blunder 001 by TheCommissarFangirl
Warhammer 40k is (c) Games workshop
Dark heresy belongs to Fantasy flight games or whatever.

Yes, this shit actually happened in a Dark Heresy Game I GM.

Story: It's a combat driven campaign of Dark Heresy I run for fun with some friends. This took place on the second mission where they escaped a prison and discovered they were on a Death World. In order to reach their Inquisitor, they have to link up with a stranded acolyte who they have lost contact with. First thing one of our guardsmen does? Go sniff a flower. I gave him another chance to rescind this decision, and warned him that dicking around on a Death World is completely :iconfullretardplz:

Long story short, he didn't listen. Now, when the GM warns you about something... you listen. I say this because I had previously put a brain leaf frond in this particular bush while setting the game up. I told him to take an agility test; he failed and chose not to fate point it (the guy had 3 fate points in all).... and it got him. If you aren't familiar with what happens when a brainleaf attaches to your head:
Permanent -10 to Ws, Bs, T, Ag, and Per. As well as 1d10 insanity points....
 So the players didn't know what to do until the NOW BRAIN LEAF THRALL got up and tried to attack them. They ripped the frond off of the guy, which immediately gave the guy an additional 3d10 insanity (bringing it up to 4d10 in all).

In the end, I chose to not make these effects permanent as they were under expensive medical care afforded by the Inquisition. But he had to play the whole mission all jacked up, and kept the insanity points.
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:iconarmamentdawg:
ArmamentDawg Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2014
It begs the question "WHY would a big, tough, 'Manly Man of Action' type of soldier want to sniff a flower? What is he, gay?" If the player becomes the butt of endless gay jokes before your campaign ends, he has only himself to blame.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
It was just... I... I don't even know what he was thinking.
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:iconlordsia:
LordSia Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2014
Have yet to convince my friends to run any 40K game, but it might be just as well; in our Ars Magica stories, we continuously dodged every plot hook thrown our way, derailed the plot hard at least once per session, and forced the GM to rewrite the ending because we RP'd our quest to redeem the main antagonist so well that he couldn't bring himself to kill her off.

It's only after we've accidentally released a borderline incurable demonic plague on Manhattan, one which killed hundreds within the first three days, tens of thousands within the first week, that we found out that the doctor we met in the first session? And then spent the rest of the story avoiding, because we discovered he had some form of magic resistance? Yeah, he was Raphael, Arch-Angel of Healing.

The person we saved, against all odds? The first and only Queen of Hell, thanks to a harebrained plan by a quartet of demonic dukes vying for ascension to the position of King of Hell.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That's always fun. I've derailed a few campaigns with just shooting motherfuckers in the head.
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:iconlordsia:
LordSia Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2014
We were once stuck in Arcadia, which basically means we were shoved into the roles of the protagonists in a story we then had to play out in order to escape. My character was supposed to negotiate with a certain baron - and since the role my character had taken was an old friend of the baron's, it was supposed to be a cakewalk.

Unfortunately, I completely misread the friendly taunting during the opening negotiations and went for the kill - literally, by magically animating the dagger of one of his knights to kill him, hoping to blame the knight for the deed. I botched the spell, and the next thing I know I'm running from a murderous golem made of animated cutlery like "Be My Guest" from Beauty and the Beast met the fucking Terminator.

Then the Dragon attacked and wrecked the castle.

We ended up allying ourselves with the beastman horde we were supposed to unite the kingdom to defend against, before overthrowing the evil tyrant. Oh, and all of the good nobles we were to convince to join our side? We either murdered them, alienated them into joining forces with the evil tyrant, or convinced them to join us only to promptly get them arrested and executed for treason.

We escaped, eventually. And although my character ended up accidentally killing one of the other characters' husband, it still went way better than the time we set off Ragnarok.

And decided to fight on Loki's side.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Well that was unexpected
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:iconbladeswinga:
BladeSwinga Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014
Today in Deathwatch (pretty much Dark Heresy with Space Marines), we had our assault marine decide to charge a massive mob of renegade guardsmen. He can't reach them before they get a volley off, nearly severing his right leg with lead and with only 2 wounds. He then decides to fire up his jump pack, and fails the piloting test badly. Uses a fate point, and fails worse, plowing through the mob in a crash landing that knocks him unconcious, has his leg stuck up a tree, and kills about half of the mob he hit. Then I, a heavy stubber totting apothecary (don't ask) have to stop shooting to save him with the help of the techmarine.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
So the sheer power of derp killed a shit ton of guardsmen andscrewed over the whole party. XD
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:iconbladeswinga:
BladeSwinga Featured By Owner Mar 23, 2014
Nearly XD We managed to get the poor soul a new augmentic leg, and we await the next trial of derpery XD
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:iconnotchthegreat:
notchthegreat Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Sorry about the repeat comment... My ipod is laggy
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:iconnotchthegreat:
notchthegreat Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Sadly, all of my irl friends are like that
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
XD Wonderful.
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:iconnotchthegreat:
notchthegreat Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yeah, that is why I attempt to run them with my (much more competent) internet friends.
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:icontheasorlinsstrike:
TheAsorlinsStrike Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
Always one of those in a group.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
And if you don't know who it is, it's probably you. XD
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:icontheasorlinsstrike:
TheAsorlinsStrike Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
It's not I've done some dumb ass things but nothing like that.
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:iconv1lian:
V1lian Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
You're running this campaign online? Do you use some special software/site or just skype/teamspeak/whatever?

Fair play on your part as the GM though. I think all GMs have had such stuff happen to them at some point :D.
I run a Fantasy campaign with some buddies. Last round, they had to retrieve something from a bandit den. So the thief sneaked ahead to scout it out. The Huntress....just walked up to the front door and shot the watchdog. In the end, she had her arm broken :D
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I use Skype with group call, and play on roll20.net. Good setup in my opinion. And yeah, dumb things happen a lot.
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:iconretartacus:
Retartacus Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Guardsman logic
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
inorite?
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:iconretartacus:
Retartacus Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
oh aye. Wish I could do a Dark Heresy rp...
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
if we had open slots I'd invite ya.
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:iconretartacus:
Retartacus Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
not much rp experience played D&D years ago
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:icon40kwarlord:
40kwarlord Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2014  Professional General Artist
Hah! Laughing  
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:iconmikazukishigure:
MikazukiShigure Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014
The title reminds me of Tropic Thunder(blunder)...
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
I was actually hinting at it a bit in the title. I mean, a bunch of clueless peeps trotting around a horrendously dangerous jungle without fully knowing the danger they are in. That, and the full retard icon I added! XD
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:iconjoeofthemasks:
JoeoftheMasks Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Inquisitor is disappoint.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
...Yeah... it was bad
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:iconjaredthefox92:
JaredtheFox92 Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
We lose more guardsman this way.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Sadly....
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:iconrecklesscharge:
RecklessCharge Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Genius. Nuff said lolol
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Heuheuheu I pretty much facedesked when this happened. They guy was dutch or something too. I felt bad punishing a guy with such a funny accent.
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:iconrecklesscharge:
RecklessCharge Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Extra points for that! HAR!
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
XD now I'm going to hell.
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:iconraven913:
Raven913 Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
OK wow... yeah, it's never a good idea to stop to admire the wildlife on a death world. :XD:
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Yeah, I know. Hey if your available, I always have a slot open in my games for D.A. friends.

Not this campaign, my serious one.
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:iconraven913:
Raven913 Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
As much as I'd love to try out the techpriest career, this semester has been kind of heavy on the reading and writing assignments... not much time left for RPGs, I'm afraid. Maybe in the summer, but probably not before then.
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:iconthecommissarfangirl:
TheCommissarFangirl Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
It's all good, focus on school
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